Why do we always make things complicated for ourselves??

I really don't know why.
I was so happy to see that guy in the morning.
And surprise surprise, suddenly, my hopes are all crushed!!! WAHAHA!!!
Saw him with another girl!!!WOWOWOW I know her.
Then one of my friends approach me asking me did you know about blablabla which of course i already knew, and asked "Aren't you angry??" i was like "Am i suppose to??" People tell me!!!
I feel so sick nowadays!!
Feel like crying again and again, till there is no more tears left!!!
But of course i have to keep telling myself to cool down and get a hold of myself.
STUPID!!!
You know WHAT??? I'm tired of this STINKING PIECE OF SHIT!!!
COME ON!!! Make up YOUR MIND!! DON"T KEEP ME WAITING!!!

And today, i decided to isolate myself from people especially him, since he need a break, i have taken out my SIM card so i that i can resist myself from messaging him!!! How am i suppose to trust you, when while it is is building up you keep hurting it??? Seeing you with another girl which obviously likes you really hurts me. Sometimes i feel like i don't want to talk to you anymore!!!! I wonder how people are going to contact me since i rarely go online, phone not available, contact my brother???HAHAHA

BEAUTIFUL LIES,PERFECT DENIAL!!!

Anyway, if he really does he'll try every means to contact me, maybe SUNDAY, i'll put my SIM back and check out who have contacted me. If none, then if it isn't strong enough then maybe i'll have to let it go.
TIME IS RUNNING OUT!!!
EXAMS are next week... Lets just get it done and over with!!

P.S what is it that i have spoilt?? What do you mean by, i spoilt everything sia???

Listening to ASMARADANA, i don't really understand the lyrics, but it seems to help me cool down!!

Stop hurting my barely breathing soul!! I BEG YOU!!!

Its as if i'm drowning and constantly struggling to get some air and people just keep pulling me deeper! I'm weakening. This is a challenge for me!!! Please please don't force me to such situations where i'll actually ignore that person really damn well as if he/she is like a stranger!!